I’ve talked about this before, but just because you’re choosing to be happy and positive does not mean you aren’t living in reality. It just means you’ve decided to take control of the things you can control and leaving the rest. It brings an incredible amount of peace when you try your best to focus on the good in each day.
Despite hardships, and I’ve had plenty, I find at least three things to be grateful for each day. It helped me through my PPA, helps me through the harder days of momming, and helps me through the days when the world seems to be falling apart. It doesn’t by any means mean that I am oblivious to those things, or pretending it’s not happening. I’m just choosing my happiness, sanity, and peace over the chaos, confusion, and stress.
I thought I would share a couple things I do to make this a reality for myself and those around me:
- Choose happiness first. In whatever situation make sure you are happy with what you are doing and that it is true to who you are and your values. This doesn’t mean that you are being selfish or that you don’t compromise. Compromise is a part of life, but make sure the compromises don’t compromise your values.
- Make a gratitude list. This one sounds so cheesy, but it really works. When you train your brain to look for the good things in each day you start to notice more of those things and less of the negative.
- Limit the negativity you consume. Yep, you have to put a hard limit on how much news you take in. Are you a reporter or journalist? If not then there is no need for you to be constantly checking in with the headlines about the chaos going on around you. Stay up to date with what matters to you, and with important news then check out and don’t go back until the next day. This is huge in being able to remain positive, especially in harder times.
- Unfollow, unsubscribe, and unfriend people or pages that make you feel overwhelmed, bad about yourself, or ignite the negativity. You are in control of the content you consume. Again people will argue that this may make the media you consume very biased, but I truly believe because I take this approach that you can be well informed from unbiased sources and not have to listen to or read rhetoric that doesn’t match your values.
- Reach for something other than your phone first thing in the morning. We all do it, and I consciously have to not unlock my phone after turning off my alarm in the mornings. The first thing most people do in the mornings is get right on their phones open social media apps, news apps, check their email, or check text messages. This can and likely does lead you down the rabbit hole of continuous consumption. When you reframe your morning and use those first hours to meditate, exercise, read a book, take the dog on a walk, or play with your kids you’re able to control how your day starts. You’re able to control your mood so much better without any outside influence. When you wait to log on to social media until later in the day you’ll see that what you see on social won’t affect you as much as it did when it was the first thing you checked after waking up.
*pro-tip if you use your phone as your alarm and have a hard time not opening social media apps go buy a traditional alarm and put your phone in a different room at night*